Darwyn Cooke: Boy Wonder (or how I learned to stop worrying and love Robin)

I could write forever about why and how much I love Darwyn Cooke's New Frontier. I'm not going to do that, because it's not like anyone needs convincing. It's clearly awesome.

I just want to point out one thing in particular about these books that I was really impressed by.

In just four pages, Darwyn Cooke made me love Robin with no reservations.

This is just so beautifully and perfectly done I almost can't stand it. It makes me want to cry.

Isn't it just so much better than, say, this:

Christ. Anyway.

It took me a long time to warm up to Robin. Years, really. I'm like a lot of Batfans; I like Batman as a loner, and sometimes it just doesn't make sense for Batman to have a partner. Especially a kid in primary colours. And sometimes it just seems that Robin is there for no reason. He's just been around for so long, that no one even bothers to examine what the hell he's doing there.

I've really liked the post-Crisis treatment of Batman and Robin's (Tim Drake) relationship. I'm sure there is going to be some drama ahead, what with the Son of the Demon making a comeback right after Bruce offers to adopt Tim legally as his son. That's going to be interesting. I really love Nightwing as a character. I like that the Robins get older, but Batman just keeps on rocking his mid-late 30s.

I listened to the podcast of the Big Three panel from ComicCon in San Diego. Grant Morrison said that he feels that Batman has learned more from Robin than Robin has learned from Batman. I really liked that comment. There has been a lot of attention in recent Batman comics (and by recent, I mean over the past few years) on the rather large family Batman has now assembled over time. He can't really consider himself to be a loner anymore, and I'm really into that. So I give credit to all the writers for making me like characters that I really wanted to hate. And for making me ok with a non-lonely Batman.

Someone asking a question at comic con to the JLA panel said that he would like to see Nightwing be a part of the new Justice League. The whole crowd, the panel, and myself all went "ooooooo!" That would be rad.

My point is that Robin is good with a little effort on the writer's part. Sometimes I'll be reading a perfectly good Batman story, and then there's an annoying kid hamming it up and ruining everything. It's often a jarring and unwelcome reminder that I spend a great deal of time and money on what is intended to be children's literature.

But, done right, you have one of the most touching relationships in comic book history.

Superman/Batman #27: Nevermind

Ladies, Ladies, Ladies!

I love Mark Verheiden, and I was stoked that he was going to take on the Superman/Batman series. I was dismayed when I saw the first cover. I believe my exact words were "I can't help but notice that neither Superman nor Batman are on the cover." Little did I know...

Gender bending is a daring subject matter even for fanfic. I applaud Verheiden for taking it on in an actual comic book. And to do it to Superman and Batman! Bravo. But for all the impressiveness of what he was trying to do, it sadly didn't really work. It was a wasted opportunity.

Basically the story is that Earth 2 Superman (gray hair) and Batman (retired) have been lured into a trap at the Metropolis Zoo. The Ultra-Humanite has placed himself into the body of a gorilla there, using Brainwave, and successfully works it so Batman and Superman switch bodies with The Huntress and Power Girl, respectively. Though they still see themselves as Batman and Superman, to each other and the rest of the world they are now women.

Sounds good so far. I think it would be funner if they could also see themselves as women, but at this point I'm just glad this is happening at all.

Check out Batman (Huntress) saying something a little flirtatious to Superman (Power Girl):

"Trust me, Clark, you're her alright." And yowzaa! You're hawt! Basically that and "Except for feeling a draft, I'm doing fine," are the only funny lines of the whole book. And that's too bad.

It gets boring and confusing because it has to be over in such a hurry. In a few pages they learn what's happening (Brainwave did it), what's going to happen (Power Girl and Huntress are going to fight back to gain control of their bodies and thus destroy Superman and Batman permanently) and what they need to do to stop it (find where their own bodies are being hidden and get...back...in them...somehow).

All I'm saying is that if you're going to give us something as delicious as SUPERMAN and BATMAN getting switched into the bodies of BUSTY LADIES please let us enjoy the ride a little.

It doesn't help that the boys are so indifferent to their situation. They just keep making small talk about what they've been up to lately.

That panel is kind of cute, though, if you consider that it's actually Superman and Batman. I like the adorable way Batman is holding on.

It's a little icky that Batman is actually in the body of his daughter. And Superman, his cousin. I mean, there's nothing specifically incestuous about what's happening here, but it's still kinda...personal.

It's a stand-alone, so by the end they get back in their bodies and all is right with the alternate world. Supes and Bats don't remember what just happened, the ladies do.

I would have like a 12-issue arc. They could have, y'know, dealt with other superheroes hitting on them. They could have taken a paycut at the Justice League. Superman would have to explain the situation to Lois. Robin would be all confused...hilarious! It would have been better if it wasn't Earth 2, though. I am just not comfortable with Earth 2. I never will be. There, I said it.

Kevin Maguire's art is pretty nice, but it's kinda gross too. I mean, obviously it's boob city, but check out this nasty porn face on Powergirl (Superman). I don't even know what her mouth is doing. Is that her tongue? Lips?

As for the cover art (Ethan Van Schiver and Moose Baumann), have you ever seen Power Girl with long, golden locks? I'm not even going to comment on the boobs, because what's the point?

I want to say thumbs up to this comic so badly. It should have been the greatest comic of all time. Instead it's a wild, mind-boggling ride that's over before it starts. Booooooo.

Detective Comics + Simone Bianchi = Hot, Hot Covers

I am so, so into the Simone Bianchi covers on the current run of Detective Comics.

I don't even care that we have gratuitous female nudity all over this last cover. Poison Ivy just makes more sense as a naked lady. And this cover is kind of hilarious anyway. You can see Batman wrestling with the situation. I like that Poison Ivy is always in control of the situation. It's hot. (Of course, she always inevitably loses control of the situation by the end of every story, but still).

The only weird thing about Bianchi's art is that the characters tend to look a little underfed. The ribs stick out like crazy. I mean, your clothes have to be seriously tight to define your ribs that much. And I know that, as far as clothing goes, superhero costumes are very tight. Still, though...look at Robin in this next one:

I really love that cover though. Even though the Dynamic Duo look more like they are doing interpretive dance than fighting crime. Batman is sort of...prancing. And Robin is...surfing?

You know what I really love about these drawings? Batman's utility belt. It's really well defined and realistic. Each compartment is a different size and shape. It's not just a yellow bar divided into little squares that somehow hold batarangs.

On the re-issues they've been adding some spot colour. That looks pretty nice too:

Oooooo...intense.

Thumbs up, Simone.

A friend of mine said the other day that right now is a great time to be alive because the best artists and writers are working on the Batman titles. It's so true. And that is why I can still get out of bed in the morning.

Internet Roadtrip #1

I'll admit that I don't read a lot of Marvel anymore. Lately it's pretty much been Astonishing X-Men, and Runaways. I was checking out their website today and it's a real mess. Check it out. It hurt me to look at it. And everything confused me. Marvel's website makes me feel old. It's what we in the media industry call "a design nightmare," or "trying too hard."

On imdb they have actually listed Heath Ledger as The Joker in 'Untitled Batman Begins Sequel'. They have 'rumoured' after his name, but still...and the other hot rumour is that Jake Gyllenhaal is going to be Harvey Dent. Um...this could be a really...good...movie. Who's the casting director? Me?

Honestly, though...Heath Ledger? The Joker? I don't really think so. I liked the Paul Bettany rumour. I thought that was a step in the right direction.

Although...
That is a pretty stretchy smile he's got there. And he looks convincing holding that spraycan (which could contain a toxic gas of some sort).

Hey, imdb now has little pictures of the actors next to their names. I like that feature. It's cute.

Meanwhile, at Kryptonsite, they're covering the upcoming appearance of Green Arrow on Smallville. Oliver Queen is being played by the same guy who played Aquaman last season. He was supposed to have his own spin-off, but that got canned. I can't imagine that it would have been a good show. I'll be downloading that pilot. He will go down in history for uttering the gayest line ever said on Smallville:

Clark Kent: "Are you alright?"
Aquaman (shirtless): "Wet and ready, bro."

To utter the gayest line ever on Smallville is no small feat. There is a lot of competition.

It was a pretty gay episode. And by 'gay,' I mean 'homosexual.'

I don't like it when shows get the same actor to play two roles. And what happens if this turns into a super-lame JLA show? Then you've got one actor playing two guys on the same show at the same time. He'd be exhausted. Wonder Woman would be all "Hey, Aquaman, where's Green Arrow?" And Aquaman would sweat and say "He's...eating...lunch."

I can understand wanting to use this actor a lot, though. He has a crazy superhero body. He made Clark Kent look like Lou Reed by comparison in this episode.

The internet is awesome.