This movie is amazing and awesome and everyone should go see it. I want to see a million more movies with the same cast.
Also, Captain Kirk is hott.
Seriously, this movie had what the Wolverine movie was missing: joy. I have not been this delighted by a film since Iron Man. Go see it!
Last night Johnathan and I got together for what should have been a perfect evening of beer, ribs and the X-Men DVDs. It took about 30 seconds to realize that no amount of beer and mapley sweet ribs would negate the fact that we were watching a terrible show.
The opening credits are great. Great music, great clips, great fonts. But after that the show pretty much falls apart every episode. Even the episodes I remembered as being good were pretty bad. The end credits were astonishingly bad.
The real problem with this show is that it is extremely loyal to an era of X-Men comics that was extremely flawed. Everyone is ugly with crazy eyebrows, terrible hair, and horrible outfits. Cable is covered in armbands, all of which are way too tight. It must take him five hours to get dressed. The stories are largely based on Claremont comics, but with all the intelligence taken out. Even the Len Wein-penned Alpha Flight episode fell flat.
The animation is lazy. The voice acting is terrible. Everyone's accents are insane. Xavier darts around in his floating wheelchair at an alarming speed in small spaces. Footage is recycled at a ridiculous rate. The characters are all flat and boring. No wonder I loved Gambit so much...he's the only one with a shred of personality. And every time Bishop is on screen we hear blues harmonica for some reason.
My favourite line was probably when Storm was buried under a pile of boulders and Cyclops's reaction was to yell "Help! Storm suffers from claustrophobia!" I think the bigger problem was that Storm was suffering from being buried under a pile of boulders.
Now keep this in mind: this series was airing at the same time as the damn near perfect Batman: The Animated Series!
So what I am saying is that I really wanted to like this. I wanted to watch it and be able to say "You know, this is a pretty solid series" because surely I did not waste hours of my life watching something really crappy. Right? I did. The world is right and I was wrong. This is not a good show. And the fact that there are no special features on the DVDs means there is no reason to buy it. But, y'know, people really like watching the old G.I. Joe cartoon too, and that thing sucks (sorry, nerds. It sucks).
I mean, I guess if you want to get stoned with your friends and redub the audio with your own jokes and post it on YouTube, this is a must-buy. But other than that, I can't really recommend it. It's best left forgotten and replaced in our collective memory by the excellent new series, Wolverine and the X-Men.
Battle for the Cowl: The Network (One-Shot)
This was interesting: Oracle and what is essentially Bird of Prey II: This Time With Dudes! vs Dr. Hugo Strange, who is setting the new Batman (meaning the Batman who is supposedly Jason Todd but almost certainly isn’t and oh look he’s on the cover of next week’s Battle for the Cowl No. 3 and I don’t think that it’s Jason Todd) up for one of his famous messed-up psychological tests: three kidnapped people (crack mother, old old lady and escaped murderer claiming innocence), two of whom will be killed once the first one is rescued. Also, he’s taking bets on the side.
I liked this. I like the “Oracle with a team of people” dynamic that went away with Birds of Prey (and how long did it take Barbara Gordon to “find herself” anyway? A week?) and there’s a nice sense of the Gotham criminal underground that you don’t often get in Batman stories but that makes sense - why not form a community? Solidarity in the face of oppression!
I feel like bitching about some of the characterization but I’m not awake enough to be the angry nerd yet. Eh, Huntress lost some of the not-psycho calm that she had picked up over in Birds of Prey but at least it fit the story, for what that’s worth. I kind of wish, though, that they’d chosen to play Ragman as the loveable schlub from Shadowpact rather than as the standard creepy supernatural character who calls people “child” and such. Misfit was good, though, and it looks as though her Dark Secret has not been forgotten, so if this spins off into a series of some sort, hopefully she’ll be there.
Groom Lake No. 2
Huh. I skipped the first issue of this because it had a smoking Grey-style alien on the cover and looked like something from a university poster sale, but the partially-skeletonized puff dog on this one managed to pull me in (ag, it's the B cover - why is it so hard to find pictures of B covers? The A cover is even more poster sale). Actually, I’m kind of glad that I did it this way, as the first issue by itself is okay but the first two issues taken as a pair are a pretty decent read.
This is neat. It’s the sort of story that… you know when you have a serious set-up (in this case an X-Files-style alien/government conspiracy) in which most of the cast is playing it serious but then a couple of off-the-wall characters are dropped into the middle and it ends up being funny and plausibly actiony at the same time? This is like that, if skewing toward the funny side of things. Sure, there’s a party-alien, but he has a legitimate reason for being so. If I’d only read the first issue I might’ve complained about some of the characters being too tough and world-weary and attitudey all the time but it actually works quite well to balance out the wacky. Nice writin', Chris Ryall!
And good art, Ben Templesmith! Why are your square-headed women so appealing? Whatever the reason, I like it. All of the characters are super-distinctive and interesting and the colouring job is beautiful and odd.
Oh, and there’s even a decent explanation for alien rectal/genital probing! Finally, my questions have been answered!
Demon Cleaner No. 1
(Written before reading this) I know nothing about this comic - I bought it because books about people fighting demons (see Hellboy, Killer of Demons, etc.) are usually a good time. The Weird Rocky Horror-style lips on the cover are kind of weirding me out.
(Reading…) Hey, this is pretty good! As I figured, the Demon Cleaner is a dude who runs around offing demons who have escaped from Hell and not (as I had secretly hoped) some sort of maid service for the damned. Demons make great villains, by the way, even better than Nazis, as the occasional Nazi can turn out to be just misled, whilst demons are pretty much the definitive bad guys. And they can generally come back again after you kill ‘em, too, which makes for a good antagonistic relationship. Miles Gunter wrote this one and did a good job with his bunch of entertainingly assholey rich people who gathered to eat demons for their medicinal value and (oh the wit) ended up biting off more than they could chew. The demons are pretty good too, especially the one who must inhabit organic matter in order to have a body - look out for the watermelon-demon, aiee!
And it looks real pretty, too. It appears that Antarctic Press is classifying it as a manga but to mine eyes it occupies the same Art Deco-descended niche as Darwyn Cooke’s work on The Spirit. Anyway, it looks nice and the monsters are cool and nicely kinetic. Also, Victor Santos draws a nice skeleton. And! This is two comics in a row with really nice mood-enhancing colouring.
Final Crisis Aftermath: RUN! No. 1 (of 6)
Okay, so my initial reason for reading Battle for the Cowl was a semi-masochistic impulse to take a bad-comic bullet for the LBW team, but that’s not working out because one the whole I’m enjoying them. Therefore, I’m going to read all of the Final Crisis Aftermath books as well. I actually have no idea if they’re going to be good or bad or what - the mess that was Countdown and the other books leading up to Final Crisis (generally - I kind of liked Salvation Run) has left me cynical about this sort of thing but on the other hand I really like the Aftermath focus characters. On the third hand, I liked them as Morrison characters, so I guess we’ll see how well someone else ends up writing them. We’ll call it cautious optimism for now. Anyway, as previously detailed I like the Human Flame, so let’s see how a series about him getting his comeuppance for being the kind of douchebag that films someone’s death on a camera phone goes…
(Reading)
All right! This was exactly what I was hoping for: the misadventures of a total dick. The Human Flame is the most unrepenetant asshole in the DCU, I think. If Sturges and Williams can keep this going for six issues it’ll be a hoot. Basically everyone is after this guy - the heroes, the villains, the Kyrgyzstani Mafia, possibly his tiny daughter - and he just keeps compounding things by acting like a bigger and bigger douchebag. Also: the return of that one uncostumed guy from his debut! Also… is Firestorm a white guy again or was that a colouring error?
Power Girl No. 1
Okay, this was great. Power Girl has had it bad for a while but if this series continues in this vein then she’s in good hands. I bought the cover pictured here and I swear, not for the boobs (though they are impressively colossal). Rather, for that fantastic facial expression and for “It’s okay! Power Girl is here!”, which is pretty much the best catch phrase ever and I hope is employed frequently.
Anyway, good writing job here - Power Girl is forceful without being the cranky-pants that she was in the old days. This Power Girl is no more likely to appreciate Wally West grossly hitting on her than the Justice League Europe version but, I don’t know, wouldn’t be as abrasive about it? Does that make sense? Basically, I like her as a character as much as ever but now I could probably have a conversation with her. Aha! I’ve worked it out: Power Girl now has a sense of humour!
One very good thing about this comic is the reintroduction of PG’s Karen Starr identity. For a while, what with all of the origin revisions and such, it was just one writer after another tearing down aspects of her character: she wasn’t Kryptonian, then she ditched her secret identity, then she was Atlantean for a while and then not Atlantean at all, etc, etc. It’s nice to have her as a cool businesswoman with interesting employees and an apartment and so forth. Also, her insane cat shows up for a couple of panels. Also also, Ultra-Humanite.
Jersey Gods No. 4
Oh man, this is such a good comic. When I read the preview back in... where the heck did I read that preview? in the back of an issue of Invincible, I think. In any case, all I was expecting was a comic about Kirby-esque gods and in-law jokes, which would have been great enough. This, though... Dan McDaid and Glen Brunswick have put together one hell of a comic. It manages to capture that great excessively weird epic quality that Kirby god-stuff had (in Thor or New Gods, take your pick). I mean, it's easy enough to whip off a plot about some ineffable cosmic being with metal gauntlets and dotted powers but hot damn! There's a very cool story taking shape here, with big 'ol flashbacks to the god-history of the past and everything. And the fashion-focused Earth plot is good too, though I expect that it's going to require some godly intervention soon.
Of course, my absolute favourite part was the meeting of Fusion and Union, who obviously knew who each other were but still felt the need to shout "I am Fusion!" and "I am Union!"
The Zombies that Ate the World No. 3 (of 8)
You know, at this point there are so many zombie comics floating around that I wouldn't necessarily grab a new one but this has two things going for it right off the bat: a great title and Guy Davis, who draws such pretty pictures that I would be into at least the first issue of anything he cared to put his pen to. Lucky for my easily-led brain, this is an entertainingly weird tale of a world where zombies and humans live together in a weird, dysfunctional society. This issue: focus on the Belgian! Andd I can't find the cover!
Fin Fang 4 Return! (One-Shot)
Okay, so acedemically i know that there are good things going on at marvel Comics that aren't just a portion of some giant crossover. Still, I'm having a hard time shedding my anti-Marvel reactionary stance. Rachelle keeps suggesting stuff, so maybe someday...
This, though... the Marvel Monster Group (or whatever) comics from a few years ago were fantastic, and the Fin Fang Four were the very best. And this? This is a comic to buy and treasure and dig out when you are at your very lowest point and yyou need to remember that the world contains pure unadulterated delight. And the stories inside are arranged by delightfulness! By the time I got to "How Fin Fang Foom Saved Christmas" I was basically vibrating with joy! Giant monsters and also Wong forever!
Atomic Robo: Shadow From Beyond Time No. 1 (of 5)
I really like coincidences. For instance, I once read a webcomic and it mentioned someone I went to university with and then the next week I realized that the blog I was reading was by the same person's brother and then the next week I found out that she was in Halifax and we went out for Eggs Benedict. How can you not enjoy a world so full of interestingness?
In a far less personal way, I was a fan of both Atomic Robo and 8-Bit Theater before I realized that Brian Clevinger wrote both of them. I guess that "being unobservant" isn''t much in the way of coincidences but still: neat. Atomic Robo is basically the perfect Johnathan comic, except for the absence of forty to sixty years of continuity. Just wait, though.
This new series looks to be just as great as the prior two. It takes place in Atomic Robo's formative years and features both Charles Fort and my old friend H.P. Lovecraft (in a delightfully frenetic and... Lovecraftian role). One issue in and I'm delighted. I have no doubt that the next four will be just as good (the Free Comic Book Day Atomic Robo was my favourite free comic book of all).
Astro City: Dark Age Book Three No. 1
Ag. This is my last book of the day - I must stop arranging these things by anticipation. If you truely want to know what I think about this after reading it check back on Friday.
(Bah, this edit is happening on Saturday) I love Astro City. Astro City is consistently what a comic book should be. A super-hero comic book, that it. And you might not agree, as is your right (but I will look askance at you). It's like Kurt Busiek sneaks into my room at night and listens to my disjointed sleep-ramblings about my comic-related hopes and dreams and then sneaks home and writes this. Fascinating and still-evolving continuity? Check. Interesting and novel characters with intriguing motivations? Check. A crazy-interesting multi-volume story that is also an extended metaphor for the shifting fates and trends of the super-hero comic book industry? Yep. Unalloyed delight? Double-check.
So this issue features Charles and Royal, the Odd Couple-ish brothers at the heart of The Dark Age on their next step on the path to vengeance during the troubling 1970s and 80s in Astro City. We got Cleopatra and Pyramid and all kinds of interesting things going on but as usual it's background to the more personal stuff that's happening. Royal's in training as a henchman for Pyramid, which is great, as henchmen are fascinating.
Astro City, my friends. You can't beat it, I swear.
Aha - we’re starting to come to some comics that I’ve talked about before. Maybe I’ll just do a little blurb about things like that instead of the whole shebang, unless something big happens, of course. Or maybe if they come out really sporadically. Or if I like them a lot. Okay, sometimes there will be blurbs and here’s one now:
Strange Adventures No. 3 - More fun with DC’s space heroes. Still a good time but I reckon I’d be getting more out of it if my knowledge of alla this stuff was more complete. As usual, it’s fun to buy a comic with the same name as the store I’m shopping at.
Irredeemable No. 2 - Woo! Still great! This issue follows Kaidan, a neato super-hero with a very cool power (and an adorable costume in the flashback that starts the issue) as she seeks out info from rogue hero The Plutonian’s girlfriend. I’m really digging this series - looks like it won’t just be the standard tale of possession by an evil spirit or what have you but a really interesting look at what could drive someone so good and so powerful to be monstrously evil. With lots of terrific characters, to boot!
The Life and Times of Savior 28 No. 2 - Another very interesting examination of the superhuman condition, this time looking at Savior 28, an ultra-patriotic type who turns to the way of pacifism and gets assassinated for it. Well-told and well-drawn, and I think that maybe it’s based on the original “let’s kill Captain America” plot as detailed in Was Superman a Spy? (I read it! It’s good!) and here.
World of New Krypton No. 3 As I said last time: this book keeps on being good and I like it. This time there’s more Labor Guild Civil Rights Movement action and possibly the first time Alura hasn’t acted semi-insane for more than a panel or two. Kal-El just keeps on showing up the Kryptonians on the morality front, too. I’ll bet a dollar right now that most of the population of New Krypton end up back in a bottle by the end of all of this, though.
Killer of Demons No. 3 (of 3) - Fun! Dave wrote about this one a couple of weeks ago and what he said still stands. Looks like this one is going to keep on , maybe in a series of miniseries or a regular series or something. Featuring: Heaven and Hell signing what is perhaps the most unbalanced pact ever!
Seaguy No 2 (of 3) - What? Grant Morrison has written something delightful and perplexing? Has the world gone topsy-turvey? Bull-dressing is the best sport ever, is what I say. Viva El Macho!
The Flash: Rebirth No. 2 - Ag! This is very interesting! Don't kill off all of the speedsters, Geoff Johns! Otherwise... carry on.
Sleep well, champs!
I have been reading a lot of Thor comics lately, particularly the very first stories from Journey Into Mystery. Honestly, I'm surprised that the character caught on so quickly. I think we can thank Jack Kirby's art.
Not that I'm not loving these comics. I love that it's essentially just the story of a dude who really wants to marry this girl, but his dad won't let him. Thor relentlessly asks his dad if he can marry her, but because his dad happens to be Odin, the ruler of Asgard and a bit of a dick, the answer is always 'no.'
I think Journey Into Mystery #107 is a pretty good representation of the early era of Thor comics. Last we left our hero, his alter-ego Dr Don Blake was forced to appear to betray Thor in order to protect his secret identity. Naturally, this did not impress the love of his life, nurse Jane Foster.
Just to complicate things further, Blake has to keep up the act as Thor and pretend to be furious with the cowardly doctor. And he has to take out his anger on poor Jane, I guess.
This is where things get adorable. I stared at these two panels for a very long time. I just love them:
And as soon as he's out of Jane's sight, Thor starts to celebrate. It's very cute.
Man those people look terrified.
But it's not all flying backwards and picking bouquets of flowers for the God of Thunder. Even as this is happening, a sinister figure is flying into town:
How did he get away from the airport without anyone stopping him?! He's obviously guilty!
It's a long cab ride to town. Fortunately for the readers, our new villain uses the time to mull over his origin story. I'm not going to show the whole thing, but basically an experiment gone wrong gives him the ability to turn things into stone by touching them
Was he making Kool-Ade?
Anyway, this dude is stone cold (get it?) and he is in town to fight and destroy Thor because he wants his hammer. And who doesn't, really? To get Thor's attention, he turns his cab driver into stone.
The police find the cab driver first, but it's a good thing that Thor shows up because this case has clearly stumped them:
Ok geniuses. First of all, you are police officers in the Marvel version of New York City, so you have definitely seen people turned to stone or crazier before. Also...you can't dress a stone statue...with stone clothes.
Thankfully, Thor takes charge and insists on bringing the statue to Dr Blake's office for examination. And Nurse Foster proves to be more clever than the NYPD.
"Saaaaay...maybe this stone guy has something to do with those other stone guys at the airport today!"
Because everyone is so slow to crack this case, it gives our villain a lot of time to change into his costume and reveal his name to us.
The costume isn't great. And his powers are...inconsistent.
Alright, I can understand being able to climb a building using his powerful stone fingers, I guess, but being able to leap across rooftops?! That doesn't make any sense.
He catches up with Dr Blake, who he doesn't know is secretly Thor, of course. He chooses an overly complicated (but charming) way of demonstrating his powers for the doctor.
Woah! Watch out, Doc! He's not messing around! That next stone paper airplane might have your name on it!
Also, really? You didn't figure out until that moment that this guy is the one responsible for all the human statues? He's the God of Thunder, not the God of Figuring Things Out.
You can probably guess what's coming: a giant battle between Thor and the Grey Gargoyle that ends with Thor being turned into a statue. Fortunately this works out ok for Thor because the statue gets knocked over. And, of course, when his hammer strikes the ground, it changes him back into Don Blake. And if you know anything about science, then you know that this will also reverse the statue effect.
That was explained very well, Doctor. Thank-you.
Now the LAME physician, as the narrator likes to call him, has a cunning plan. He makes a phone call to a certain alcoholic robot friend and before he knows it his crazy plan is ready to roll! Literally!
Ooooo! A motorcycle! Who's lame now?!
This plan is complicated, but basically he is zipping around New York on a motorcycle mounted with a camera that is projecting a hologram of Thor. This causes the Grey Gargoyle to chase the hologram, which ends with Don Blake driving the motorcycle, and himself, into the Hudson River. Due to some poor judgement, Grey Gargoyle follows close behind:
Ooooo...guess who can't swim when he's stone?
Because the stone effect won't wear off for at least half an hour, Grey Gargoyle is pretty screwed. Well played, Don Blake.
In the end, the cab driver turns back to normal and rudely points out Dr Blake's disability.
Wouldn't you like to know, Jane. Wouldn't you like to know.
Free Comic Book Day 2009 has come and gone, and once again, the event was a raging success. At Strange Adventures (more specifically, at St. David’s Church Hall around the corner—the event outgrew the store some years back), we gave away in the neighbourhood of 20,000 comics. Actually, we ran out shortly after 1 PM, which is definitely the earliest that’s ever happened. Cal and a small army of volunteers gave away the freebies, while Rachelle, Tiina, and myselft ran the store, and we were swamped as well—it seems that when people are given a bunch of free comics, they usually supplement them with comics and graphic novels that they have to pay for. This is a good arrangement for everybody. Anyway, here are some random observations about this year’s FCBD, in no particular order:
1. FCBD usually happens the day after a major comic book movie is released, and it’s usually the hot topic of discussion. This is a lot more fun when the movie is, say, Iron Man. When it’s X-Men Origins: Wolverine, there is a lot of shrugging and saying things like “I dunno, it was better than X-Men 3”. That right there, my friends, is faint praise indeed.
2. People are a lot more receptive to trying new comics out on FCBD, and not just the free ones. For instance, we sold a ton of random comics off the kids’ rack, lots of copies of recent buzz books (like Vertigo’s creepy new Unknown Soldier series, and tons of Green Lantern related stuff), and a whole lotta trade paperbacks and hardcovers. One guy even bought all four Absolute Sandman collections, after admitting that he’d never read any of it! That is a dude with no fear of commitment.
3. Funniest/Most Ridiculous Quote of the Day, delivered by some random gothy-looking kid: “Frank Miller’s comics are okay, but I prefer his movies.” Say what now?
4. When little kids show up in super-hero costumes for FCBD, it is not only adorable as all get out, but it makes all the hard work involved totally worthwhile.
5. When I have a few drinks in me, as I did at the FCBD after-party at the Seahorse (thanks again, Cal!), do not, I repeat, do NOT get me talking about how cool the T.H.U.N.D.E.R. Agents are. If you do, you’d better get comfortable—you’re gonna be there awhile, trying to decipher my slurry ramblings.
Until next year…
Sorry this is so late. Free Comic Book Day and all that.
Ok, this was not a great movie. For the first half I was pretty into it, and then it just got stupider and stupider. Hugh Jackman gave a great performance, and he was totally RIPPED. I don't find Jackman all that attractive except when he's Wolverine (and, oddly, I don't find Wolverine attractive unless he's Hugh Jackman). He was certainly looking good in this movie. Liev Screiber was also very good as Sabertooth, and looked great. He really gave it his all, I think. If you are a fan of Deadpool or Gambit, though, prepare for disappointment. The movie suffers from too many mutants. It's like they were just trying to round up everyone who didn't make it into the other three X-Men movies and cram them into one movie (plus Cyclops, who according to this timeline must have been in his fifties by the time of the first X-Men movie).
And, actually, I am going to drop some spoilers here. If you care about this movie, I guess, don't read past here because I have some bones to pick.
1. Adamatium bullets? ADAMANTIUM BULLETS?! What in hell? That makes no sense!
2. This movie did the same thing that bothered me about the other X-Men movies. They threw in a bunch of background mutants, some of whom are really major characters in the comics, but they made no effort with them. In the second and third X-Men movie you had Colossus with no Russian accent. I mean, that's a small thing that makes a big difference when bringing a character to life. Why can't his two lines be delivered with a Russian accent? We saw the same thing in this movie with Emma Frost, who is Canadian (?!) and shows up very briefly.
3. When Gambit first showed up on the screen I was momentarily excited because I had been waiting about 15 years for this. But I was quickly bored because it was clear the character wasn't going to fit into the movie in any tidy way, and the actor, while very attractive, wasn't really going to go for it with the Cajun accent. And then he fought Wolverine for no reason.
So, in conclusion, the first half of this movie showed promise, which was quickly destroyed in the second half. But if you just want to see Hugh Jackman being sexy with his shirt off for an hour and 45, this is your movie.
Living Between Wednesdays is a place for people who love comic books and superheroes.
