In this week's Archie Sunday installment, from Veronica #143 (October, 2000) Jughead feigns heterosexuality to thwart Veronica's attempts to do the first authentically nice thing she's ever done in her life.
It starts when Veronica, a lonely only child hidden under a bitchy exterior of wealth and vanity, feels left out when Betty arrives at the beach with her sister.
As an aside, I like how in the Archie universe the siblings of the main characters can age, but not the core characters themselves.
Veronica finds someone she can talk to on the beach: Jughead's kid sister, Jellybean.
Jughead is pretty uninterested in the whole thing. He chooses a picnic basket over his sister:
After Veronica selflessly plays frisbee with the kid for, oh let's say hours, Jellybean sets a playdate with her new friend:
That diabolical bitch!
Well of course you do, Jughead. You're a giant douchebag.
Things start to take a wrong turn, I guess, when Veronica starts playing with Jellybean into the wee hours of dinnertime:
"Enough is enough!" says the Jones family, oddly.
Which bad habits is Jellybean picking up? Selflessly sharing your time with children? Accessorizing? Anyway, Jughead has a crazy plan:
You are a weird and terrible guy, Jughead. But, hey, at least you've crushed your little sister's happiness.